奥巴马给女儿的信 ----- 停止再做的17件事情

       这是一封细致入微的家书，非常感人。贵为总统的奥巴马给女儿的信亲切、自然、朴实，没有大话、套话，说的全是家常嗑。17条建议非常具体，每一条都可以做得到、每一条都有益！行文的语气也没有作为父亲或者总统的“谆谆教导”，从“不在外面吃饭”这类小事，到“这个世界是一个完全由大家分享的世界，你所做的每件事都会影响到别人”这类普世价值观，奥巴马都说得贴切、自然、优美。

       下面特别推出中英文对照版，希望在学习与做人方面，能对阅读者有所裨益。

　　1 – Stop Doubting Yourself

　　停止怀疑自己

　　If you don’t believe in yourself, nobody will. Success starts in your mind, and if all you’re doing is putting yourself down and predicting failure, it’ll become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead of doubting yourself, think positively. Not only will you be happier and more successful, you’ll spread it to everyone around you.

　　如果你自己都不相信自己，那没人会相信你。成功源于你的头脑，如果你所做的是不断地看扁自己，预言着未来的失败，这就真的会成为现实。与其怀疑自己，不如积极的考虑问题。不仅会让自己更加开心和成功，你还能够感染到周围的人。

　　2 – Stop Being Negative

　　停止消极

　　Now that you’re done doubting yourself, stop doubting others. You don’t like when people are critical of you, so stop being critical of others. Think about how you make other people feel – even if you have good intentions, people don’t like hearing negativity.

　　现在你不要再怀疑自己了，也别再怀疑身边的人。你不希望被人对你挑剔，那么也不要再去挑剔身边的人。想想你给别人带来的什么样的感受吧——即使出发点是好的，别人也不想听到那么多消极的事情呀。

　　3 – Stop Procrastinating

　　停止拖延

　　I don’t feel like procrastinating right now – I’ll do it tomorrow. When you procrastinate, you remain stagnant. Whatever you’re putting off doesn’t go away; resolve the problem, and move on. You’ll be much happier in the long run.

　　我现在不想做，还是留到明天吧。一旦开始拖延，其实你已经停滞不前了。你拖延的事情不会自行解决。解决问题，继续前行吧。从长远角度来说你会更加快乐。

　　4 – Stop Being Mean

　　不要那么刻薄

　　It’s completely possible to step on someone’s toes without meaning to – it happens all the time. There’s no need to pile on by purposefully doing mean things, so make a conscious effort to stop being mean. If someone wrongs you, let it go. There’s no need to seek vengeance unless that’s the type of person you want to be.

　　无意踩到别人的情况真的有可能会发生——常常会发生。但没必要去处心积虑的做一些不好的事情，所以要有意识地让自己不要那么刻薄。如果有人对你无理地对待，随他们去好了。没必要去报复，除非你也想成为那一类的人。

　　5 – Stop Eating Out

　　不要在外吃饭

　　Eating out is the biggest waste of money. Every so often it’s nice to treat yourself, but eating out for every meal is the quickest way to drain your bank account. Learn how to cook at least a handful of foods you enjoy: It’ll save you money, keep you healthier, and occasionally impress people.

　　在外面吃饭真的非常非常的浪费钱。也许每次对于你而言都是一次犒赏，但每顿都在外面吃反而是花光积蓄的最快方式。至少也去学学怎么做一些自己喜欢的菜：既能省钱，还能让你更健康，还会让其他人眼前一亮。

　　6 – Stop Being Lazy

　　不要再偷懒

　　Lazy people are annoying – it’s like pulling teeth getting them to do anything. If I can’t do something as simple as going to a movie with you without having to factor in an hour of convincing you to get your lazy butt out of bed, I’d rather go alone. People have enough trouble motivating themselves; don’t make your friends and family waste their valuable energy motivating you as well.

　　懒人真的很招人烦——得像赶驴磨墨一样逼着他们做事情。如果我想跟你看一场电影，却不得不花一个小时说服你起床，那我宁愿一个人去看。给自己动力都不是件容易的事情，就别让朋友和家人浪费宝贵的精力再来给你动力了吧。

　　7 – Stop Complaining

　　停止抱怨

　　We all have problems, and sometimes we need to vent to someone. That’s acceptable, but pay attention to how often you’re venting. We all love helping our friends and family, but when all you get from someone is negativity, it’s easier to cut them off than help, especially if they’re always complaining about the same things.

　　我们都有麻烦事，有时候总想跟别人倾诉。这可以理解，但要注意你吐槽的频率。我们都喜欢帮助朋友和家人，但如果从那个人身上我只能感知到负能量，那么还是离得越远越好吧，尤其是当他们在反复抱怨同一件事的时候。

　　8 – Stop Being Selfish

　　别再那么自私

　　If you only think about yourself, you’ll soon find yourself by yourself. Stop for a minute and think about how your actions affect other people – did you take the last cup of coffee from the break room? Refill it! Do you live with others? Don’t drink out the milk carton. We share this world 100% of the time, so every action you take can affect other people.

　　如果你只考虑你自己，那么很快你会发现身边只剩下你自己。停一分钟想想你的行为会给别人带来什么影响吧——你是不是从休息室拿了最后一杯咖啡？再倒满呀！你是不是和别人合租？不要喝光所有的牛奶，这个世界是一个完全由大家分享的世界，你所做的每件事都会影响到别人。

　　9 – Stop Wasting Time

　　别再浪费时间

　　I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: time is the most valuable resource we have. Don’t waste your time on unproductive things. If you want to explore the world’s dark corners, that’s great. I still associate with people who have not-so-kosher careers, but I don’t hang out with those people at the expense of my own short- and long-term goals.

　　虽然之前说过了，但我还想再说一遍：时间是我们拥有的最宝贵的资源，不要把时间浪费在没有意义的事情上面，如果你想探索这个世界的黑暗角落，很好。我也认识一些没有固定工作的一些自由职业者，但我不会以牺牲自己的短期长期目标为代价和他们出去玩乐。

　　10 – Stop Making Promises

　　别再做承诺

　　Always under-promise and over-deliver. When you make a promise, you’re adding responsibility to your plate that, despite all your best intentions, you may not be able to deliver on. More often than not, your promise is an absolute (i.e “I promise I’ll always love you”), and only Sith deal in absolutes. Instead of making a promise with your words, simply be there when people need you, and exceed their expectations with your actions.

　　总是做承诺，总是做不到。每次做承诺都是不禁给自己增添了责任，无论你的出发点有多好，你都不可能完成所有的部分。大部分时候，你的承诺都太过绝对（比如“我发誓我永远爱你”），也只能在绝对环境中才能实现。与其用语言许下承诺，不如在别人需要你的时候出现，然后用行动达到他们的期望吧。

　　11 – Stop Being a Pushover

　　不要做老好人

　　We live in a capitalistic society in which everyone’s trying to sell us something. Everyone’s looking out for themselves in one way or another, and you need to do the same. Stop putting yourself out because you’re too shy to say no.

　　我们所处的社会，每个人都试图告知我们一些事情。每个人都从不同的角度去找寻着自己，你也需要，你要做的就是在合适的时候说不。

　　12 – Stop Listening to Haters

　　不要听讨厌的人说话

　　No matter what you want to do in life, there’s always someone around to tell you why it can’t and won’t work. I can come up with millions of reasons Twitter won’t work, and yet it’s one of the most popular social media sites on the web. My opinion didn’t stop Twitter’s success any more than it convinced Kobe Bryant to quit the NBA or Josh Hartnett to stop acting. Why would you let someone’s opinion stop you?

　　无论你想干什么，总会有人告诉你不要这么做，没有用的。我可以想出成百万条推特不实用的理由，但它还是互联网上最流行的社交网站之一。我的想法不会阻止推特的成功，就像你无法劝科比退出NBA或乔什·哈奈特不要当演员了一样，都毫无意义。那么为什么要让别人的想法阻止你呢？

　　13 – Stop Being Wasteful

　　停止浪费

　　You don’t finish your meals, and away food instead. You leave the faucet running when you brush your teeth, pouring precious water down the drain. You drive places you could easily walk, burning gasoline (a non-renewable resource). You are wasteful, and it needs to stop.

　　你饭没吃完，然后扔掉食物；刷牙的时候还开着水龙头，就让宝贵的水哗哗的流走；明明可以走到的地方你偏要开车，燃烧汽油（无法再生资源）。如果你浪费了，那就赶紧停止这一恶习。

　　14– Stop Littering

　　不要乱扔垃圾

　　The only thing I hate more than wasteful people are litterbugs. Litterbugs are my least favorite bug, and there are more than you’d think. If you’ve ever thrown even one piece of gum, paper, candy wrapper, cigarette butt, etc on the ground, you’re a disgusting litterbug, and you should be ashamed of yourself. There are over 7 billion people in the world – if each person only throws one “innocent” piece of garbage on the ground, that’s 7 billion pieces of garbage littering a world in which nobody “did it”.

　　唯一一个让我觉得比浪费的人更可恶的就是垃圾虫。垃圾虫最让我厌恶，而且永远多的让你数不清。如果你曾扔过一块口香糖，一张纸、糖果包装、烟蒂，那么你就是恶心的垃圾虫。你应该感到耻辱。世界上有超过70亿的人——如果每个人都无意识的扔一点垃圾，那么全世界就会变成70亿垃圾场，哪怕没有罪魁祸首。

　　Your one decision makes a HUGE difference, and I will not allow you to blow it off and walk around with your head held high. You’re a litterbug, and it needs to stop immediately. You don’t get a lifehack for this one, you filthy animal. Just stop – you already know how.

　　你的一个决定会产生深远的影响，我不赞成你去大马路大声高呼。如果你是垃圾虫，那么就需要马上停止了，也许不会救命，但能让你不那么惹人厌。停止这一举动吧，你知道该怎么做的。

　　15 – Stop Taking Everything Personally

　　别把每件事太往心里去

　　People get offended about the strangest things. Take Kendrick Lamar’s now-infamous verse on “Control” this summer: he called out a list of a dozen rappers he thinks he’s better than (and he’s right). The internet went crazy, and rappers all over the industry rushed to their mics to record a response. The thing is, all K-Dot said is he’s the best rapper. Everyone took it personally, and that’s exactly what he was going for. The lesson to learn from this is that not everything is about you, and if you’re easily upset, someone will use that to their advantage.

　　人们会因为一些奇怪的事情感到被侵犯。就拿Kendrick Lamar这个夏天备受争议的歌曲《Control》为例：他在歌词中挑衅了一些他认为比他弱的说唱歌手（的确是这样），一石激起千层浪，整个说唱界的歌手都蜂拥录歌作为回击。重点在于，所有的人都认为自己是最好的说唱者，每个人都更看重自己，这就是他的目的所在。这件事教给我们的无非就是不是所有的事都要围着你转，如果你是玻璃心，有人会利用这一点。

　　16 – Stop Talking

　　不要再说话了

　　Sometimes it’s best to just STFU – especially in relationships. I can’t even count how many times I created an issue that didn’t need to be an issue simply because I opened my mouth. Even if what you want to say is important, just shut up and ride it out. You can say more with your actions than words, and you can’t listen when you’re talking.

　　有时候沉默是金——特别在情侣关系里。我都记不清到底多少次因为说错话引发了本可以避免的争端。即使你想说的非常重要，那也闭嘴，自行消化。你可以用行动证明一切，毕竟你自己说话的时候是听不见的。

　　17 – Just Stop, and Breathe…

　　停一下，深呼吸吧

　　No matter what you’re doing in life or how your day is going, there’s always room to just stop for a moment and just breathe. Try it right now to celebrate getting through this list of everything you’re doing wrong.

　　无论你现在在干什么，这一天过得怎么样，你都需要好好停一下深呼吸。不如现在就歇一歇，犒赏自己总算挺过了一些错事。

       这是一封细致入微的家书，非常感人。贵为总统的奥巴马给女儿的信亲切、自然、朴实，没有大话、套话，说的全是家常嗑。17条建议非常具体，每一条都可以做得到、每一条都有益！行文的语气也没有作为父亲或者总统的“谆谆教导”，从“不在外面吃饭”这类小事，到“这个世界是一个完全由大家分享的世界，你所做的每件事都会影响到别人”这类普世价值观，奥巴马都说得贴切、自然、优美。

       下面特别推出中英文对照版，希望在学习与做人方面，能对阅读者有所裨益。

　　1 – Stop Doubting Yourself

　　停止怀疑自己

　　If you don’t believe in yourself, nobody will. Success starts in your mind, and if all you’re doing is putting yourself down and predicting failure, it’ll become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead of doubting yourself, think positively. Not only will you be happier and more successful, you’ll spread it to everyone around you.

　　如果你自己都不相信自己，那没人会相信你。成功源于你的头脑，如果你所做的是不断地看扁自己，预言着未来的失败，这就真的会成为现实。与其怀疑自己，不如积极的考虑问题。不仅会让自己更加开心和成功，你还能够感染到周围的人。

　　2 – Stop Being Negative

　　停止消极

　　Now that you’re done doubting yourself, stop doubting others. You don’t like when people are critical of you, so stop being critical of others. Think about how you make other people feel – even if you have good intentions, people don’t like hearing negativity.

　　现在你不要再怀疑自己了，也别再怀疑身边的人。你不希望被人对你挑剔，那么也不要再去挑剔身边的人。想想你给别人带来的什么样的感受吧——即使出发点是好的，别人也不想听到那么多消极的事情呀。

　　3 – Stop Procrastinating

　　停止拖延

　　I don’t feel like procrastinating right now – I’ll do it tomorrow. When you procrastinate, you remain stagnant. Whatever you’re putting off doesn’t go away; resolve the problem, and move on. You’ll be much happier in the long run.

　　我现在不想做，还是留到明天吧。一旦开始拖延，其实你已经停滞不前了。你拖延的事情不会自行解决。解决问题，继续前行吧。从长远角度来说你会更加快乐。

　　4 – Stop Being Mean

　　不要那么刻薄

　　It’s completely possible to step on someone’s toes without meaning to – it happens all the time. There’s no need to pile on by purposefully doing mean things, so make a conscious effort to stop being mean. If someone wrongs you, let it go. There’s no need to seek vengeance unless that’s the type of person you want to be.

　　无意踩到别人的情况真的有可能会发生——常常会发生。但没必要去处心积虑的做一些不好的事情，所以要有意识地让自己不要那么刻薄。如果有人对你无理地对待，随他们去好了。没必要去报复，除非你也想成为那一类的人。

　　5 – Stop Eating Out

　　不要在外吃饭

　　Eating out is the biggest waste of money. Every so often it’s nice to treat yourself, but eating out for every meal is the quickest way to drain your bank account. Learn how to cook at least a handful of foods you enjoy: It’ll save you money, keep you healthier, and occasionally impress people.

　　在外面吃饭真的非常非常的浪费钱。也许每次对于你而言都是一次犒赏，但每顿都在外面吃反而是花光积蓄的最快方式。至少也去学学怎么做一些自己喜欢的菜：既能省钱，还能让你更健康，还会让其他人眼前一亮。

　　6 – Stop Being Lazy

　　不要再偷懒

　　Lazy people are annoying – it’s like pulling teeth getting them to do anything. If I can’t do something as simple as going to a movie with you without having to factor in an hour of convincing you to get your lazy butt out of bed, I’d rather go alone. People have enough trouble motivating themselves; don’t make your friends and family waste their valuable energy motivating you as well.

　　懒人真的很招人烦——得像赶驴磨墨一样逼着他们做事情。如果我想跟你看一场电影，却不得不花一个小时说服你起床，那我宁愿一个人去看。给自己动力都不是件容易的事情，就别让朋友和家人浪费宝贵的精力再来给你动力了吧。

　　7 – Stop Complaining

　　停止抱怨

　　We all have problems, and sometimes we need to vent to someone. That’s acceptable, but pay attention to how often you’re venting. We all love helping our friends and family, but when all you get from someone is negativity, it’s easier to cut them off than help, especially if they’re always complaining about the same things.

　　我们都有麻烦事，有时候总想跟别人倾诉。这可以理解，但要注意你吐槽的频率。我们都喜欢帮助朋友和家人，但如果从那个人身上我只能感知到负能量，那么还是离得越远越好吧，尤其是当他们在反复抱怨同一件事的时候。

　　8 – Stop Being Selfish

　　别再那么自私

　　If you only think about yourself, you’ll soon find yourself by yourself. Stop for a minute and think about how your actions affect other people – did you take the last cup of coffee from the break room? Refill it! Do you live with others? Don’t drink out the milk carton. We share this world 100% of the time, so every action you take can affect other people.

　　如果你只考虑你自己，那么很快你会发现身边只剩下你自己。停一分钟想想你的行为会给别人带来什么影响吧——你是不是从休息室拿了最后一杯咖啡？再倒满呀！你是不是和别人合租？不要喝光所有的牛奶，这个世界是一个完全由大家分享的世界，你所做的每件事都会影响到别人。

　　9 – Stop Wasting Time

　　别再浪费时间

　　I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: time is the most valuable resource we have. Don’t waste your time on unproductive things. If you want to explore the world’s dark corners, that’s great. I still associate with people who have not-so-kosher careers, but I don’t hang out with those people at the expense of my own short- and long-term goals.

　　虽然之前说过了，但我还想再说一遍：时间是我们拥有的最宝贵的资源，不要把时间浪费在没有意义的事情上面，如果你想探索这个世界的黑暗角落，很好。我也认识一些没有固定工作的一些自由职业者，但我不会以牺牲自己的短期长期目标为代价和他们出去玩乐。

　　10 – Stop Making Promises

　　别再做承诺

　　Always under-promise and over-deliver. When you make a promise, you’re adding responsibility to your plate that, despite all your best intentions, you may not be able to deliver on. More often than not, your promise is an absolute (i.e “I promise I’ll always love you”), and only Sith deal in absolutes. Instead of making a promise with your words, simply be there when people need you, and exceed their expectations with your actions.

　　总是做承诺，总是做不到。每次做承诺都是不禁给自己增添了责任，无论你的出发点有多好，你都不可能完成所有的部分。大部分时候，你的承诺都太过绝对（比如“我发誓我永远爱你”），也只能在绝对环境中才能实现。与其用语言许下承诺，不如在别人需要你的时候出现，然后用行动达到他们的期望吧。

　　11 – Stop Being a Pushover

　　不要做老好人

　　We live in a capitalistic society in which everyone’s trying to sell us something. Everyone’s looking out for themselves in one way or another, and you need to do the same. Stop putting yourself out because you’re too shy to say no.

　　我们所处的社会，每个人都试图告知我们一些事情。每个人都从不同的角度去找寻着自己，你也需要，你要做的就是在合适的时候说不。

　　12 – Stop Listening to Haters

　　不要听讨厌的人说话

　　No matter what you want to do in life, there’s always someone around to tell you why it can’t and won’t work. I can come up with millions of reasons Twitter won’t work, and yet it’s one of the most popular social media sites on the web. My opinion didn’t stop Twitter’s success any more than it convinced Kobe Bryant to quit the NBA or Josh Hartnett to stop acting. Why would you let someone’s opinion stop you?

　　无论你想干什么，总会有人告诉你不要这么做，没有用的。我可以想出成百万条推特不实用的理由，但它还是互联网上最流行的社交网站之一。我的想法不会阻止推特的成功，就像你无法劝科比退出NBA或乔什·哈奈特不要当演员了一样，都毫无意义。那么为什么要让别人的想法阻止你呢？

　　13 – Stop Being Wasteful

　　停止浪费

　　You don’t finish your meals, and away food instead. You leave the faucet running when you brush your teeth, pouring precious water down the drain. You drive places you could easily walk, burning gasoline (a non-renewable resource). You are wasteful, and it needs to stop.

　　你饭没吃完，然后扔掉食物；刷牙的时候还开着水龙头，就让宝贵的水哗哗的流走；明明可以走到的地方你偏要开车，燃烧汽油（无法再生资源）。如果你浪费了，那就赶紧停止这一恶习。

　　14– Stop Littering

　　不要乱扔垃圾

　　The only thing I hate more than wasteful people are litterbugs. Litterbugs are my least favorite bug, and there are more than you’d think. If you’ve ever thrown even one piece of gum, paper, candy wrapper, cigarette butt, etc on the ground, you’re a disgusting litterbug, and you should be ashamed of yourself. There are over 7 billion people in the world – if each person only throws one “innocent” piece of garbage on the ground, that’s 7 billion pieces of garbage littering a world in which nobody “did it”.

　　唯一一个让我觉得比浪费的人更可恶的就是垃圾虫。垃圾虫最让我厌恶，而且永远多的让你数不清。如果你曾扔过一块口香糖，一张纸、糖果包装、烟蒂，那么你就是恶心的垃圾虫。你应该感到耻辱。世界上有超过70亿的人——如果每个人都无意识的扔一点垃圾，那么全世界就会变成70亿垃圾场，哪怕没有罪魁祸首。

　　Your one decision makes a HUGE difference, and I will not allow you to blow it off and walk around with your head held high. You’re a litterbug, and it needs to stop immediately. You don’t get a lifehack for this one, you filthy animal. Just stop – you already know how.

　　你的一个决定会产生深远的影响，我不赞成你去大马路大声高呼。如果你是垃圾虫，那么就需要马上停止了，也许不会救命，但能让你不那么惹人厌。停止这一举动吧，你知道该怎么做的。

　　15 – Stop Taking Everything Personally

　　别把每件事太往心里去

　　People get offended about the strangest things. Take Kendrick Lamar’s now-infamous verse on “Control” this summer: he called out a list of a dozen rappers he thinks he’s better than (and he’s right). The internet went crazy, and rappers all over the industry rushed to their mics to record a response. The thing is, all K-Dot said is he’s the best rapper. Everyone took it personally, and that’s exactly what he was going for. The lesson to learn from this is that not everything is about you, and if you’re easily upset, someone will use that to their advantage.

　　人们会因为一些奇怪的事情感到被侵犯。就拿Kendrick Lamar这个夏天备受争议的歌曲《Control》为例：他在歌词中挑衅了一些他认为比他弱的说唱歌手（的确是这样），一石激起千层浪，整个说唱界的歌手都蜂拥录歌作为回击。重点在于，所有的人都认为自己是最好的说唱者，每个人都更看重自己，这就是他的目的所在。这件事教给我们的无非就是不是所有的事都要围着你转，如果你是玻璃心，有人会利用这一点。

　　16 – Stop Talking

　　不要再说话了

　　Sometimes it’s best to just STFU – especially in relationships. I can’t even count how many times I created an issue that didn’t need to be an issue simply because I opened my mouth. Even if what you want to say is important, just shut up and ride it out. You can say more with your actions than words, and you can’t listen when you’re talking.

　　有时候沉默是金——特别在情侣关系里。我都记不清到底多少次因为说错话引发了本可以避免的争端。即使你想说的非常重要，那也闭嘴，自行消化。你可以用行动证明一切，毕竟你自己说话的时候是听不见的。

　　17 – Just Stop, and Breathe…

　　停一下，深呼吸吧

　　No matter what you’re doing in life or how your day is going, there’s always room to just stop for a moment and just breathe. Try it right now to celebrate getting through this list of everything you’re doing wrong.

　　无论你现在在干什么，这一天过得怎么样，你都需要好好停一下深呼吸。不如现在就歇一歇，犒赏自己总算挺过了一些错事。